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Cycle 19, CD 7
[Click here for more information about Emhart's September Photo Challenge] Prompt: PureI found a love for gardening quite a few years ago when we lived in the country with more land and light than I...
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Cycle 19, CD 13
[Click here for more information about Emhart's September Photo Challenge] Prompt: BlueGrowing up, my mother had life-threatening allergic reactions to cats. So despite my tears and incessant pleading,...
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Cycle 19, CD 19 (1 DPO)
[Click here for more information about Emhart's September Photo Challenge] Prompt: GardenA close friend was scheduled to come for a visit in late July. We'd been counting down her arrival for months....
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Cycle 19, CD 27 (10 DPO)
[Click here for more information about Emhart's September Photo Challenge] Prompt: CozyWhen my eyes first blink open in the morning and I see this, it almost makes the day ahead seem tolerable. It...
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Cycle 19, CD 32 (14 DPO)
[Click here for more information about Emhart's September Photo Challenge] Prompt: MoonI'm very sad that it's the last day of Emhart's photo challenge. Though I didn't come close to posting every day,...
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Cycle 19, CD 34 (16 DPO)
A lot has happened in the week since I last posted.Let me start off by saying, everything went according to plan at the airport. As I thought, TSA was on top of their game and screamed out, "Excuse me...
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Cycle 19, CD 36 (18 DPO)
Beta #2 came back with good doubling numbers.I've been numb ever since I saw that second line. Numb, dotted with bit of fear. Then last night, out of nowhere, I broke down into uncontrollable sobs. In...
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Cycle 19, CD 40 (22 DPO)
Beta #3 came back with good doubling numbers. At 22dpo I'm sitting at 8712 which actually exceeds the high end of the hcg chart. Last week was really hard for me. The shock of finding out I was newly...
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Cycle 19, CD 44 (26 DPO)
After my last beta, they scheduled me for my first ultrasound. Based on my LMP, I should have been 6 weeks yesterday.I was working on getting to a calmer place mentally but facing that first...
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Standing still, again
I walked out of my RE's office with a box in my hands. A box I am all too familiar with, stamped with bold blue typeface: PRODUCTS OF CONCEPTION.I don't even know what to write anymore. What new words...
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Standing still, Day 3
I'm writing about this in the hopes that: 1) I might find someone else who has suffered from this and 2) Perhaps I can help someone by writing about my experience. If not today, maybe someday in the...
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Standing still, Day 4
I've been feeling very numb the last few days. It's not like I don't know what is going on. Diagnostically I know what happened. I know what the next steps are and that none of it is good. But it has...
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7 weeks, 1 day
Scene: A bright spotlight shines on Universe as he walks out from behind the curtains. He holds his hands up in the air and the audience quickly hushes. "Intermission is over. Please take your seats...
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7 weeks, 4 days
I find it difficult to post lately. Not because I don't want to, but because I don't know where to start. I guess I'll just start with the concrete stuff.My u/s yesterday was everything I hoped it...
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8 weeks, 0 days
I'm exactly where I was when I lost my last pregnancy. The significance of this day is not lost on me. If I find out on Wednesday that we still have a heartbeat, this will officially be my longest...
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Standing still, again
There was no heartbeat today. Appears that it probably stopped a few days ago.As much as I was trying to prepare myself for this, the extreme 24-7 morning sickness gave me a little hope. I suppose it...
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Recovery: day 5
The D&C went as well as something like that could go. I'm still sore and bleeding but slowly mending. Physically at least.I just want to thank you all again. Your comments, emails, texts, gifts-...
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Recovery: day 6
A brief interruption from our regularly scheduled doom and gloom:Today is a very important day guys. VERY important. There are big things on the line and a lot of potential risk. There have been enough...
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Recovery: day 13
The day we found out we lost the heartbeat, I was standing at the bus stop on my way to meet Mike for a Broadway show that had been scheduled months prior. Being out in public was hard. People flitted...
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Recovery: day 14
I'm lucky in that my fertility clinic is amazing in so many ways. It's clear that Dr. D cares very much. As does her staff. I get calls to make sure I'm healing and bad news (and good) never comes from...
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